rawakramblings

You can say that you 'understand' what you're going through but honestly, only a mom can say "I feel you..." to another mom. 

The sacrifices I go through as a mom are just 'challenging' but yet rewarding. I'm not sure how you can feel both feelings at the same time but I just do. I'm just exhausted of taking care of my baby and then suddenly she kisses me, and all that tiredness just go away. You're tired and yet, satisfied and happy. And its not that I HAVE to do everything perfectly but I try, because I want the best for my child. Don't all parents do?

Sometime last week, Mr. was telling me that I should spend some time reading books - as he haven't seen me doing that for quite sometime. The next thing I know, I was blurting out how 'I don't seem to have time for a lot of other things too - like going to the movies. Or for my mani pedi. Or to read the quran. Or to update the blog...Or to even sleep!' The worst thing is I even compared my responsibility to his - how he has time for gym, for reading his favourite books and magazines, for futsal..and can even get his full night sleep.

And then I realized what a HUGE mistake that was - comparing responsibilities. Because the truth is, we both have our own responsibilities to carry. I didn't bother to try understand what other things are on his shoulders and the things he has to work on as the leader of the family. And at that moment, I forgot all the things that he has been doing to help out with the baby - he has been quite a support, and I didn't even thank him for that. Why the need to compare? Why the need to bring up what's fair and what's not? Why not just carry out our own responsibility for the sake of Allah? Ikhlas. 

and like I said, there are things that mothers go through that only other mothers understand. like seriously, how can I runaway from breastfeeding my daughter when she wakes up at night, right? How do I runaway from my daughter who only wants me and only me when I get back from work. And I WANT to breastfeed her, and I LOVE that she is so clingy towards me.. they're the best feeling ever! 

So goodbye to all these me-time at the moment, because I'm actually enjoying the me-time I have with my babygirl. I will cherish this while she is still a baby because they will grow up really fast.. and like what other mothers say, by then, we will wish that she becomes a baby again.